Wednesday 2 September 2015

Six films I'll be giving a shit about in


AAAAAAAAH!

I'm hoping so hard that this is the first in a series of five films whose titles consist almost entirely of repeated vowels. (4th)

ME AND EARL AND THE DYING GIRL

Looks lovely, like Boursin risotto. (4th)

LEGEND

So Tom Hardy reckons he's as good as BOTH Kemp brothers, does he? Well we'll see about that. (9th)

EVEREST

The story of how a group of brave men experienced such debilitating extremes of cold that they set up a double glazing company to keep it out for good. (18th)

99 HOMES
"Michael Shannon magnetises all eyes" says Time Magazine, somewhat improbably. Great news for everyone yearning for the alignment of their positive and negative ocular particles, but I can't help thinking it'll be hard to enjoy the film with bits of metal stuck to your peepers. (25th)

THE MARTIAN

Having repeatedly read that this trailer contains spoilers, I refuse to watch it. Although if the spoiler is just that it's yet another disappointing Ridley Scott film, that doesn't count, I guessed that already. (30th)

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